One Sided Relationships
I think quite a few of life’s problems are the result of one sided relationships. As we travel the country working with people and horses, the one sided relationship seems all too prevalent. We see people who do everything they can to meet the needs of their horse but never ask the horse to meet any of their needs. I guess the people are getting some need met at some level but the horse is not having to do anything except be present. They feed it, they groom it, and they worm it, provide it with fresh water, and trim its feet all the while asking it to contribute very little to the relationship. When they do actually ask the horse to do something they are met with resistance or the request is ignored. They then seem disappointed that their loving horse is treating them so rudely. They shouldn’t be surprised because that is the way they set up the relationship to begin with. They are often afraid to ask anything of the horse because they are afraid the horse might blow up. So they go about their relationship not asking for anything that might cause a blow up. They somehow justify it by saying things like “It is my responsibility to provide for this horse’s needs because it can’t do these things for itself.” That may be true but it is capable of meeting some of the humans needs also. We believe that a relationship that is not good for one is eventually not good for either. Any time a relationship is one sided it is eventually going to cause some problems.